I feel terrible that I haven't updated my blog in a while and so much has happened since I last posted.
Happy News:
For starters my Mom had her 16 month check up for bladder cancer and I am SO HAPPY to announce that there was no visible cancer found. We are just waiting on cytology reports next week and will celebrate her being 16 months cancer free!!
We have begun the process towards IVF, and we have taken our blood work for cystic Fibrosis, Fragile X and Infectious disease panels and according to the RE, all of our bloodwork came back normal. Except for my thyroid, so he upped my medication. Speaking of medication, I am COMPLETELY off any type of medication for depression and anxiety. I have been off antidepressants for 2 years and 5 months, off one of my anti anxiety medications for 7 months and the final anxiety medication, took me months to wean off but I am completely off that as well, for over a month now.
I won't lie and say that at times I don't feel anxiety creep back in, but I have been able to talk myself through it. I am so thankful that the medication was there when I needed it, but thankful even more that I no longer need it.
I had lost 43lbs, but gained back 15, lost 5, so I am still up 10 but currently working on getting that off plus an additional 15-20lbs before we transfer, God willing.
On a more tragic and somber topic:
One of the men who kidnapped and murdered my childhood best friend stood trial last month and was found guilty. The jury had decided that he should face the death penalty. I agree. He has a Spencer hearing on the 27th, where he can basically plead for life in prison instead of death, but considering he escaped prison (where he was serving 30 years for killing someone else) I think the judge will laugh at it and sentence him to death. The other two are awaiting trial. One begins in June. Please keep Vincent's friends and family in your prayers as they have had to relive this nightmare over and over. The loss of Vince was incredible and everyone who knew him feels a deep ache in his absence. I know that he is with me at times, because I feel his presence around me. I don't question for a second that he is watching over my Mom. I love and miss him dearly. I wish so much that he could have experienced all the things he dreamed about in life. It pains me when I hear about how much he wanted to get married and have children. His wife would have been one of the lucky ones, and his children would have had a father who was not only funny, charismatic but also a genius. (He was the smartest person I ever knew, even at 8! His friends later on in life concur that his intelligence was unmatched!)He was robbed of life, a life that had such an impact on so many people and would have certainly changed the world, had he had the opportunity to do so. I have promised to try to live my life and take chances, chances that he will never have, in honor of him.
And to change the direction from a life taken to a life created:
My coordination appointment for IVF is on Monday, St. Patrick's Day, which happens to be Vince's favorite holiday. There are so many signs that he is with me that I cannot ignore. I truly hope that he watches over me during all of this, along with my Dad and Grandpa.
